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THE LESSER-KNOWN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES #14 -- VALGOL VALGOL is enjoying a dramatic surge of popularity across the industry. VALGOL commands include REALLY, LIKE, WELL, and Y*KNOW. Variables are assigned with the =LIKE and =TOTALLY operators. Other operators include the "California booleans", AX and NOWAY. Loops are accomplished with the FOR SURE construct. A simple example: LIKE, Y*KNOW(I MEAN)START IF PIZZA =LIKE BITCHEN AND GUY =LIKE TUBULAR AND VALLEY GIRL =LIKE GRODY**MAX(FERSURE)**2 THEN FOR I =LIKE 1 TO OH*MAYBE 100 DO*WAH - (DITTY**2); BARF(I)=TOTALLY GROSS(OUT) SURE LIKE, BAG THIS PROGRAM; REALLY; LIKE TOTALLY(Y*KNOW); IM*SURE GOTO THE MALL VALGOL is also characterized by its unfriendly error messages. For example, when the user makes a syntax error, the interpreter displays the message GAG ME WITH A SPOON! A successful compile may be termed MAXIMALLY AWESOME!
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    TOP STORYDaschle Criticizes Bush for Thwarting Independent Probe of Sept. 11 - Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle criticized the Bush administration Thursday for thwarting creation of a commission to investigate last year's terrorist attacks, saying an independent
    submited on 11-14-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source 911 topic Investigation - Find Similar


    TOP STORYCIA Director Suggests Iraq May Not Strike Unless Provoked - WASHINGTON (AP) - CIA Director George Tenet told lawmakers Tuesday that Saddam Hussein might not use his weapons of mass destruction - unless provoked by fear of an imminent U.S.-led attack.
    submited on 10-09-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source War topic Iraq - Find Similar


    TOP STORYKennedy Uses Ceremony to Call Bush Doctrine 'imperialism' - "Might does not make right. America cannot write its own rules for the modern world. To attempt to do so would be unilateralism run amok. It would antagonize our closest allies whose support we n
    submited on 10-06-2002 from ap.tbo.com by JudiLyn source Bush topic Protest - Find Similar


    TOP STORYUS Supplied Germs Iraq Used for Biological Weapons, Documents Show - D'uh, which were then destroyed during and after GW1, tell us something we DON'T KNOW! Like why are we so EGAR to attack now?
    submited on 09-30-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source War topic Iraq - Find Similar


    TOP STORYAshcroft: FISA Court Exceeded Authority in Rejecting His Terrorism Rules - In the documents signed by Attorney General John Ashcroft, the government said the U.S. Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Court raised "significant constitutional questions" when i
    submited on 09-26-2002 from ap.tbo.com by kainah source Ashcroft topic Civil Libirties - Find Similar


    TOP STORYFBI Agent Blocked From Pursuing 9/11 Hijacker: "Someone Will Die" - Thirteen days before the Sept. 11 attacks, a frustrated FBI agent warned headquarters that "someday, someone will die" after he was denied permission to pursue a man who would become one
    submited on 09-20-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source 911 topic Warnings - Find Similar


    TOP STORYJudge Demands That FBI Explain Why It Missed Emails Written by Sept. 11 Terrorism Defendant - The judge in the case against Sept. 11 conspiracy defendant Zacarias Moussaoui is demanding an explanation from the FBI about how it could have missed evidence o
    submited on 08-28-2002 from ap.tbo.com by papau source 911 topic Questions - Find Similar


    TOP STORYJustice Department Lawyer: Government Is Not a Bunch of Barbarians - "You should not think you're dealing with a bunch of barbarians. That's not true," Assistant Attorney General Michael Chertoff, the administration's lead anti-terrorism prosecutor - TIPS
    submited on 08-11-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source TIPS topic Civil Rights - Find Similar


    TOP STORYAs pre-9/11 secrets emerge,a question:'what else did the government know?
    submited on 06-09-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source 911 topic Warning - Find Similar


    TOP STORYCIA Says It Told FBI About Eventual Hijacker
    submited on 06-04-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source 911 topic CIA - Find Similar


    TOP STORYCIA Failed to Share Full Story on Hijackers With FBI, INS
    submited on 06-03-2002 from ap.tbo.com by NNN0LHI source 911 topic CIA - Find Similar


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